2020-01-06 - Nervous Nellie Behind the Wheel
I have always been a nervous, defensive driver. Learning to drive as a teenager was traumatic, and didn't come easily. Yesterday, I was in my first traffic accident. It was my fault. No one was hurt physically, and I am grateful. It was the worst event in my life, and I can't take it back.
I can still hear the scraping of the car and all the sights and sounds in my mind. How do you get over something that you caused? I can accept the Lord's forgiveness, but I am having a hard time forgiving myself and the expense and inconvenience I caused.
Prayer is the first step to healing, so I asked God to help me. I don't want to relive those dreadful details; instead, I want to learn from my mistake and not be afraid of messing up again.
Lamentations 3:21-24 may be a familiar Scripture. It's what I am reminding myself over and over when an unpleasant thought enters my mind. These words reassure me that it is okay to be hopeful and know that God has me covered. Even when awful things happen, He won't leave me. God was with me in the car accident. He isn't the one blaming or chastising me. Yet there is one ray of hope: his compassion never ends. It is only the Lord’s mercies that have kept us from complete destruction. Great is his faithfulness; his loving-kindness begins afresh each day. My soul claims the Lord as my inheritance; therefore I will hope in him." (TLB)
Lord, I see myself as damaged goods. How can anyone trust me again? I know You do, and I thank You for loving me and forgetting my sins when I ask forgiveness. Please show me how to heal and not let my memories define me. In the name of Jesus, I pray, Amen.
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